Thursday, March 01, 2012

Midnight Cowboy of Astoria

So I'm running up and down Steinway Street in Astoria in a frustrating and futile attempt to find a store with a decent selection of ladies business suit jackets when some guy blocks my way. He was Asian, maybe late 20s, fairly normal-looking and...
THE GUY

Excuse me, would you like some company right now?

ME
(???????!!!!)
Not right now. Thanks.

And I quickly walk past him. And it occurs to me: I was just propositioned by a male prostitute!

Because that was no pick-up line I ever heard of - "would you like some company right now."

The poor guy. He should watch the movie Midnight Cowboy before he tries to make a career out of hustling women on the street. Midnight Cowboy was made in 1969 but nothing has changed for men wanting to sell sex to women - there are too many men who are willing to give it away. Especially, from my personal experience, men in their 20s.

The Cowboy was played by the now extremist right-winger Jon Voight although he was liberal then. He is also more attractive than the guy I met on the street - after all, he is the father of Angelina Jolie - and even his character couldn't make it as a male prostitute for women. He thought he finally found a female customer, and they go back to her place, and when she realizes that he expects her to pay him for his attentions she flips out and yells: "I happen to be one hell of a gawgous chick!" And he feels so bad that gives her money instead.

The closest I ever came to that kind of thing was my sister's bachelorette party at a place in Philadelphia called The Cave. It was pretty wild and there were young well-muscled guys in little thong-like underpants running around and we were supposed to put money into their underpants, but when one guy came up to me, I couldn't do it. It felt so degrading to treat him like that, so I just handed him the money. Which was probably not what he wanted since the only place he could store his money was in the thong and he probably ended up putting the money in there himself - I don't know, I looked away in mortification.

I certainly appreciate masculine pulchritude and if women can make money by wearing little outfits in front of people then men should have the opportunity too. But I don't actually want to participate myself. It seems so depersonalized and heartless. If a guy needed money I'd rather just give him money than make him do something sexual in exchange. I really don't know how anybody could pay for sex - where's the fun in that?